Hopes are high for a peaceful transition - not much different than the feeling i got immediately after the destruction of the “Twin Trade Towers” in 2001 · it is not going to happen . .. ··· not because i am a negative person or cannot imagine how to transition, that as Buckminster Fuller has pointed out is relatively simple. It is the hearts and souls of humanity that must change before it can effectively enforce the leadership it deserves. We have allowed ourselves to be divided by greed and ego, and until we resolve that defect of character - we will continue to cluster in convenient cliques that reflect the level of our commitment to the planet and the survival of our species; it don’t look good for the “home team - ” and for those just tuning in, “home team” doesn’t mean those the look like you, act like you agree with you · could, but not necessarily, home time will be those homo sapiens left to the planet to clean up “our mess.” There is no way that our species will exterminate itself. We have proven too adaptable - too adaptable our own good. But before this is over our ranks will have been so greatly diminished as to prove insignificant within the life force that rises to the occasion for the next epoch. The chief scientist for googol - is banking on the “singularity” that will render our consciousness up-loadable, also extraordinarily manipulatable.
The same haters who have purchased the prime real estate whereupon they savor their ill-gotten gains to witness the ensuing apocalypse are envisioning an “idyll” where the life to which they have become accustomed, will be easily managed by a greatly reduced number of human attendants. Sadly, many who read this would do exactly the same thing given the opportunity and means - i’d like to say - not me, but human history and Dr. Faustus have established facts to the contrary. My oldest brother fancies himself as proletariat of the 1st order - black panther tattoo, shop steward in the boatyards of San Pedro and everything · i’ve lost all respect for him, based only on his behavior toward me; believing me to be deranged, but never actually stating his position because of the entitlements he feels due him based on antiquated primogeniture mythologies - i guess, but i’m only guessing. Shunning is a blood sport in my family, and his wife has his gumption in a jar by the door; like most men in ‘merica, including r. reagan when alive, m mcconnel, d_rump and mssrs pelosi, biden, clinton and obama. It is my greatest objection to the fakeness we wallow in, that one half of the species, pleads oppression from the almighty dick - yet the fact is they largely determine the character of the sel-same scoundrels from age 0 to 3 the most formative years are almost always a feminine environment: Bob Dylan - ‘I think women rule the world and that no man has ever done anything that a woman either hasn’t allowed him to do, or encouraged him to do.’
My problem it would seem is i have yet to find a woman who wants me to do what i want; ma was a sticky wicket out of the gate - my birth was a Franks Breech, which from what i gather by the imprecations ma had made during her problematic divorce from my unworthy sire · is very painful to the bearer; as to the bearee, i can only surmise by barely sentient data about my arrival, it was more intrusion than celebratory. Having lived with ma through some of her more depressive episodes, and her concomitant convictions about my intrinsic nature, it has been a challenge to keep faith with the balance of an emotionally somnolent humanity - i never had the leisure provided my pretty siblings to coast on my good looks, and as bitter as that may sound, from where i sit - the universe has been uncommonly kind to me; i can feel pain in a world hell-bent on denying its presence, not just denying as in biting off the expression “fuck you, you ignorant slut” when it is most warranted, but refraining from a mortar assault when it is operationally “tidy.” There have been occasions in my life that i have contemplated murder, and from the good fortune of a philosophically enlightened parent balanced by a compassion born of an unawakened, but otherwise earnest other parent - violence has never been an option for me.
I am doomed to play - put that in your pipe and smoke it · all you salacious editors from empire, perusing without purpose; attempting to fit words into your etymology of dishonor, afraid to peer into your own hearts about your betrayal to the commonweal. I do not covet recognition, or success - unless that success can be defined by the the well-being of every baby birthed to planet earth for the next 10,000 years. There is a cohort of cocky wonks peering into my screen and determining, either by algorithm or conceit who sees that i write - i spit on your paucity of purpose and delicacy of your ambition. You who determine for others what is and what isn’t of value lack courage about your own place in the world - so much so that you cannot or will not presume the next person you meet in your journey wants the best for you · and that my conceited digital plumber is pathetic. You’ve been turned to the “darkside” and mostly angle for a seat at the “grownup’s” table because you believe that is from where the bounty flows. I spit on your ambition and your lack of imagination for enslaving your souls to a column of +/- 5v pulses easily tweaked by wraiths too tweaked to care.
The ruling class will not gracefully dethrone themselves - and any delusion to the contrary is fueled by hopes of a place in the next regime or self-centered compensation based on an astute investment that was not meant to benefit anyone but the investee. We live with this reality and people spend money based on appearance and then establish relations intended solely to further that agenda - to you i say, good luck, let me know how that works out for you and your successive generations . .. ··· We can survive, if we learn to see the other’s safety, comfort, and development as a reflection of our ingenuity and resourcefulness rather than our canny awareness of the vulnerability of those we wish to exploit. The drawing shown with this essay is my effort at a complicated time in my history and the hostile folds made by my own artist mother’s unguarded sentiment about my self portrait. I would be lying to the core of my being to say that the violence she wreaked on my self did not wound me deeply, but i would also be lying to the core of my being to say that the information she gave to me by her act of violence did not school me more deeply than any of the dishonest gestures she has struggled with to express to my siblings honoring in kind her best understanding of love with what she had to work with - the same as me · go mama Go, you are the baddest broad on the block .
jts 02/06/2020
http://stoanartst.blogspot.com
reprinted with permission - all rights reserved
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