Opening this edition without lenses and fortified by no more than hope - i ask again, “does anyone need anything i can provide?” . . . anxiety about the day’s events force this post into a “2fur”. The river “Thu Bon” is still rising and there is a tropical depression forming off the Southeast cost - i don’t know what that means, but i can say the relentless drumbeat of rain on the ceiling is no longer a comfort, nor nostalgic, rather a portent of the days to come for all of our species. As a young mind, when i realized that close study of anyone discipline was not appetizing to my hungry mind, i began an effort to gain understanding of the underlying principles of many studies from those conventional wisdom deemed “expert.” This strategy has been useful in discerning the thinking of many wise men. For example, with regards the “climate change” or “rape of mama Gaia,” however you can her the common event, i learned that the most predictable bell weather for future climate events was former behavior - if it was dry, it will be more dry; if it was cold, it will be more cold, etc., etc., etc.
This is proving true in much of my travel over the past 5 years across as many continents; now here on the Central Coast of Vietnam (Viet Nam). We’re facing innundation, that while has historical foundation - is only going to grow worse as a coastal city · It breaks my heart, but not like it will affect the families who have tilled this land through the ages of war, trade and invasion. What can be done is the same question as “when is the best time to plant a tree - twenty years ago; when is the 2nd best time to plant a tree - today.” Barely a paragraph into two days and i am exhausted. Have done what i could to buoy people, likely more exhausted with more at stake; my fear seems only to be of the unknown - something i’ve been frightened of since birth.
Not sure if i want to remain with the people i am surrounded by. It goes in and out of focus with one moment great affection and the next - “who the fuck are you¿ and why are you talking to me · do i owe you money?” Kidding sort of, i received an email ballot from 1,000’s of miles away and my confidence of being counted is a nearly far. There is something mysterious in the unrelenting rain around my home and within the community i feel great ______fill in the blank. The problem being that this disquiet seems to haunt my steps like the hateful elder siblings of my youth. Do you think there might be a connection?
We are all now faced with the consequence of our decisions - mine is in a drunken stupor or a rained soaked estuary - yours i cannot know of, nor particularly care about if you don’t. The heat has relented to where i might sleep, un-assaulted but not beguiled by continued confusion about meaning that is clear enough. Our species, you and i, are subjects in a grand experiment about how much destruction can one DNA strand endure before it breaks and runs for higher ground? not much further from where i stand. My family cohort has been entirely dismantled by by an ideology of Dielectrics and Materialism that has been no more useful to humanity than hinduism, buddhism, or omnism - yet retains a stranglehold on our collective unconscious about which way to evolve · fuck you and the horse you rode in on.
I know a pink skinned pony of a woman in the flat lands of B-Town California who can even from this great distance evoke spasms of (thought interrupted by storm #6, (now 3 days later 121020 _______fill) in the blank; but even as late as 1st, or 2nd thing this morning am remembering features i meant to post to our last fb exchange, yet just now when i traveled back to finish my thought the conventional rigidness of the land where she lives and i fled from was brought into high relief when i found my unfinished comment deleted from that thread. The bitter ironic truth that i must face is that the same narrow-minded censorous behavior i fled from in the oil fields of Kern County, CA “McCarthy Land” are as entrenched and enabled in the entrepreneurial expat community where i have fled to in a Socialist Republic in Southeast Asia. I am an existential buffoon - here on earth to provide mirth to Madame Paradox and her offsprings “’Tis and ’Tisn’t,” during the wheezing last gasps of our much hoped from, but greatly disappointing “exceptional species.”
jts 09/10/2020
http://stoanartst.blogspot.com
reprinted with permission - all rights reserved
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